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these faces get me every time

the-haiku-bot:

i-give-chess-pieces-to-people:

i-point-out-typos:

mini-labrynth:

asciicompletionist:

btc-official:

it-hurts-to-post:

is-this-yuri:

thedisagreer:

empathviv:

This is a NO GIMMICK ACCOUNT ZONE

If your shit is called something like “we-rate-posts,” YOU ARE NOT WELCOME. GO HOME

I disagree

There’s a tension here that’s really interesting to observe. The OP is almost a call to action for gimmick blogs, inviting attention despite the contradiction. It comes across as almost tsundere, doesn’t it?

The call is answered by the perfect gimmick blog, calling out the contradiction by way of simple disagreement. The response is teasing and even domineering in the way it recontextualizes the entire post. It is the punchline, the center of attention, but wouldn’t exist without the original setup.

While it seems like this post could be seen as a negative interaction, I think it’s actually quite cute. It shows the kind of playful back and forth that could occur between two flirty girls.

Conclusion: This is yuri.

AHHHHHHHHH OW

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Follow For More #Bitcoin BTC Prices and Infomration

“# % ’ ,-. 0123 56 9: >? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOP RSTU W Y abcdefghi klmnopqrstuvwxyz

64/94 total (68%)

10/32 symbols (31%)

7/10 digits (70%)

22/26 capital letters (85%)

25/26 lowercase letters (96%)

@i-point-out-typos @alphabetcompletionist

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Informration

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[ID: a pair of outstretched hands, offering a chess piece. End ID]

[ID: a pair of

outstretched hands, offering a

chess piece. End ID]

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

jame7t:

Remember to always be unethically androgynous

teaboot:

yourscreechingruinscollector:

helloitsbees:

medusasstory:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

Lying to children is fun when they know you are being ridiculous. When you hold up a carrot like “guys look at this huge Cheeto” and they all scream “NOOOOOOOOO that’s a CARE-OTT!”

“What? No, it’s my giant Cheeto.”

“NOOOOOOO!”

When I was a camp counselor a fellow counselor claimed that any silly camp song we sang was “his next hit single” and we should all follow him on SoundCloud and he stuck by this daily and it never ceased to amuse both the adults and the children.

When children are small and learning to count and you say the numbers out of order? Peak comedy.

“How many toys are there? Let’s see… oneeee, twooo, six!”

“NO! One two three!”

“What? Are you sure? Let me try again. One, two… six?”

“Noooooo!”

Once reduced a toddler into a fit of giggles by singing “A B C D E F Q.”

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Tags from @windyvalleyzone

on Halloween at the store i work at there was a little boy in a Batman costume, and as I was helping his mom I kept addressing him as Mr. Superman and Mr. Aquaman & he kept correcting me, “noooo, BATMAN” until they were leaving and he very seriously told me, “actully, I’m Ryan”

@wearepaladin

my favourite thing to do when a small child hands me a random object with no clear intent is to answer it like a cell phone. Gets em every time

sosaysdean:

I hate applying for jobs. “desired salary for this role” one billion dollars next question

visit-ba-sing-se:

I could have lived in peace (stayed warm in my bed) but my enemies (job that pays my bills) brought me war (e-mails i have to respond to)

luigis-slut:

luigis-slut:

Hang on. I think I’ve cracked the code

A spectrum with 3 points. On the left is a pair of gay men drawn by Gerard Donelan. On the right is a pair of lesbians drawn by Alison Bechdel. In the center is Calvin's dad fron Calvin and HobbesALT

Is this anything?

musicalhell:

delusion-of-negation:

imightbe-a-robot:

It’s been 15 years since one of the best scenes of Doctor Who 😭😭

[tardis whoosh]

“ahh :/”

[tardis whoosh]

“ahh :D”

I can’t decide if it’s funnier if the Doctor just did a really shitty parking job, or the TARDIS did it on purpose as a practical joke.

random-meme-bot:

charlesoberonn:

loqui-mortuis:

chaos–themralds:

tmmyhug:

o/ <- person waving

o7 <- person saluting

ol <- person raising hand

o1 <- person scratching head

\o> <- person stretching

\o/ <- woohoo!

<o> <- EXTREME STRESS, LIKE “OH FUCK OH SHIT” STRESS

I interpret <o> as this

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<o> ∆ <- Levitating Pizza

homunculus-argument:

The absolute height of the unintentional comedy of life that I have seen was in the finnish glass museum. Interior design is one of those things that’s kind of a big deal here, one of those things that people who grew up somewhere are surprised to hear that their country is not all that known for. My friends share it in the group chat every time an american movie or show they’re watching has a vase, water glass or candleholder in the background that they immediately spotted was by a finnish designer. I took up a whole paragraph to make it clear that this is A Whole Thing here.

Anyway, in the glass museum, one of the displays was a feast table set with the absolute classics, hits and highlights of finnish glassware designs - the absolutely fanciest plates and serving dishes, wine glasses and water glasses, carafes and pitchers. I could pretty confidently say that the entire presentation, if sold item-for-item, cost more than my first car. Perhaps twice as much, easy. An unfathomably expensive, fancy, finest table set of finnish design that you and I are too poor to ever get our hands on.

And on one of the plates was a dead fly.

And I had never seen anything funnier in my life. All these fine dishes and plates all empty, and on just one plate at the end of the table was a dead fly chilling on its back like that was the whole feast. The main course. One single dead fly. A human could not have thought of anything more absurdly funny than the specific location that one random fly had died out of pure happenstance. I fought myself so hard to keep my volume to museum-acceptable levels that instead of laughing out loud I went straight into hysterical gasping with tears in my eyes. I could not perfectly recreate the image from memory, but I can’t let you go before I try to sketch it nonetheless:

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